Why So Serious?

I've decided that sometimes a girl just has to have a little fun.

My son Robin and I were in Seattle last week looking at colleges. For those of you who haven't yet taken part in this exercise in the later part of child-rearing, it's intense, it's emotional and it's exhausting. One evening as we sat around in an Admissions-office-induced stupor, surrounded by flyers and college catalogs, it occurred to us that if you were to produce a modern-day setting of Romeo and Juliet, you would have to keep in mind that they would have modern electronic communications. So we wrote a new version of the next-to-last scene, with Friar Lawrence texting Romeo blow by blow updates of what's happening with Juliet, with Romeo's replies. And here it is, for your scholarly reading pleasure.

juliet not reely dead ok
got it
ok now in toom
ok me too
sure shes not dead man
dude no way
see paris dont worry ;)
paris lol
what a wuss
dude mess him up
where are you
in driveway
im standing behind cript
in doorway
paris sees you
oop fuck
ow
oops
not dead not dead
i think i got him
can i go now
lol
go check on juliet now
wont wake up
just put her in the car
ok going to las vegas
ok have a good time
yeah see you


There. Our contribution to the modern-day cultural scene. I guess Robin can go to college now.